Two years. Two weddings.
When my wife and I decided we were going to get married we knew that we wanted to have a wedding ceremony where our families could attend. However, it wasn’t a viable option at that time, so we decided to have a private ceremony with only our closest friends.
The specific date we wanted to get married on was 11/11. This worked out nicely, as that was the date of Veteran’s Day that year, and we were guaranteed the day off from work. My wife invited her best friend, and I invited mine. We met the Justice of the Peace ( who was actually just a friend from work ) at the Vietnam Memorial in Jacksonville, North Carolina in our finest clothes for the shortest ( and best ) wedding ceremony there had ever been.
Five minutes and about 100 kisses later, and we were married! The newly married Moneyseeds and our two friends headed off for lunch, followed by an awesome folk-rock concert ( Old Crow Medicine Show ).
It was one of the happiest and best days of our lives. Including the marriage license, the entire day cost us less than $200.
Just less than a year later we found ourselves living in Maryland with a new addition to the family, a daughter, Little Moneyseed. There were two big events that we wanted to plan: our wedding where family could attend, and a baptism for our daughter. This was only an issue because her family lives in Minnesota, and my family lives in Rhode Island, so it would be very hard ( and expensive ) to have everyone fly into town twice.
What if we could do both at the same time? We talked to the church and they were on board with the idea, as was our family. Everyone flew in from around the 
country to attend the ceremony and celebrate with us afterward. We skipped the fancy things like having a band, a professional photographer, and even a venue for the reception. Instead, we made a ton of food ($200), bought a bunch of soft and hard drinks ($150), and brought the party back to our house.
Some of our more willing family members stepped forward and took roles in cooking, photographing, and performing the readings at church. They helped make what could have been a stressful day extremely easy and enjoyable for us.
Some of our expenses included: paying the church to perform our ceremony ($75), hiring an organist ($50), and renting tables and chairs from a local party supplier ($50). The biggest single expense for the entire event was the wedding dress ( about $300 ).
Total expenses for wedding number 2 ( with the baptism ): about $1000.
Everyone wants the perfect wedding. We had two, and they totaled about 1/16 the cost of the average wedding ( about $20,000 ). Weddings don’t need to be expensive to be awesome!
We’re doing it again
Almost 5 months ago we had our second daughter, Baby Moneyseed. We’ve been procrastinating with her baptism for a while now, but we finally came to a compromise that works not only for our families, but also for us and our budget.
“1st Birthday Cake Smash” by Dimery Photography
We are going to combine our older daughter’s 2nd birthday party, and our younger daughter’s baptism into one ceremony/celebration. We will effective save money on all fronts: food, beverages, and most importantly our families will save money by only travelling once. The Moneyseeds like to extend savings to family as well, how considerate is that!
Since this event will take place over the summer, we will maximize the use of our charcoal grill. Two months before the party we will head to Costco and pick up non-perishable party supplies ( Solo cups, plastic silverware, paper plates, napkins, etc). One month before the party we will head to Costco a second time to buy meats ( hamburger, hotdogs, steak, sausages, etc ). Buying necessary supplies over 2-3 months will help reduce impact on our monthly budget.
( I’m not going to guesstimate the expenses this early in the planning process. I will write an updated post closer to the date, or shortly after breaking down the total cost. )
Even if you live within a reasonable vicinity of your family and friends, you can combine events together to maximize attendance and cut down on expenses. I can hear people saying “you are just being cheap!” or “what’s the difference of a couple hundred bucks?” Personally, I don’t consider myself cheap whatsoever. I am economical, and I think in the long-term. Cutting a few hundred dollars here and there will add up over time, and bring us closer to Financial Independence.
What do you do to cut down on family get-togethers?
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